Awkward Moment:Who is this Big-Booty-Chick on His Phone?

This theme park was incredible and beyond belief magical. I was having the time of my life. In addition, I made new friends. They were brothers. They also weren’t from the US. My friends and I spent all day with them. I was closest in age with the middle brother, Peter. Being my inquisitive self, I asked him a million questions about his life while waiting in ridiculously long lines. Peter was the handsome, strong, manly, mysterious, adventurous type with long hair. His foreign accent was the cherry on top. I noticed throughout the day, I’d catch him staring at me and smiling. When I would catch him, he never said anything and would just keep smiling. Being from Texas, it just comes naturally to me to be friendly to strangers, so I would just smile back. When my girlfriend got a chance, she whispered to me, “I think he likes you. He keeps looking at you and he only wants to talk to you.” I was picking up on that too. I think some men think women have no idea when you’re into them, but most women can smell it from 100 miles away.

After a full day at the park, all of us needed to meet up with some other people we came with. The park was so large we needed to walk at least a mile to get to the meet up spot. We had to decide whether or not we wanted to take a ride on a golf cart to get there or walk. While chatting about this decision, I caught Peter giving me googly eyes again. This time he put his arm around me. I was freaking out and probably blushing even though no one would ever be able to tell. He took his arm off after about a minute. The group came to a decision and we were going to walk. There was so much chaos happening because the park had just closed and the crowds of people were looking like a mass exodus of herds of cattle. Peter started walking and I was walking next to him. Our friends were close behind. Peter was suddenly walking at lightning speed and the crowds were so large, it was easy to get lost, so I sped up the pace to keep up with him. That’s when I realized we were separated from our friends. I asked, “Should we wait for them to catch up to us?” He was quick to say no. That’s when I realized he was just trying to get me alone. I totally fell for it!

Peter put his arm around me for a SECOND time! This time he left it there! Public display of affection is definitely not something I’m used to. Maybe you should read my purity blog and you’ll understand why. I started stuttering. Everything that came out of my mouth sounded so stupid. We had to meet everyone up at a certain time. Peter pulled out his cell phone to check the time. Something caught my eye though. There was a big-booty-chick in a thong on his phone as the wallpaper!!! WHAT THE?!?! Oh NO! What microscopic amount of interest I had in this guy dissipated. What a bust. No thank you. Not such a great first impression. What’s funny is he didn’t even know I saw.

When we got to the meetup spot, he wanted to keep walking with me and we passed up everyone. I could tell he was just buying time, so he wouldn’t have to say bye. I was just thinking, “Oh, dear Lord. Please don’t try to kiss me.” Peter went on and on about how this wasn’t goodbye and he was going to come to my city and visit me. “This isn’t goodbye, Ndi. I’m going to see you again,” he said. He was still making googly eyes at me. He gave me a hug and left. Thankfully, he didn’t try to kiss me.

That was the first and last time I ever saw him. I laughed hysterically about it with my girlfriend who thought he liked me. I mean, REALLY? IS THIS REAL LIFE? You’re trying to holler at me but you got a big-booty-chick on your phone? Boy, BYE!

 

Advertisements

Awkward Moment:Stalking a Stranger

There he was. I had never met him, but man did I think he was beautiful and when he sang it was like the voice of an angel. One day as I went to the grocery store with friends, I saw him running on the side of the road. Then to my surprise he ended up coming inside the same exact grocery store. I had never seen him so up close before. I was giving a creepy stare and indiscreetly following him around trying to make out if it was really him. It was. I think he noticed me, but he might’ve been scared. Haha. My roommate also thought he was cute, but she reported back to me that he was very much taken. I wasn’t really bothered by it because I never planned on talking to him. ┬áSeveral months pass and one day, Instagram ┬ásuggested I follow him. It must’ve been all the mutual friends. I of course took the liberty of stalking every photo he ever posted all the way back to 2011. Sometimes when I do that amount of stalking, I get this strange feeling almost like the other person knows what I’ve done. The next day I go to a grocery and you’ll guess who I saw! It was him! And he was walking down my aisle! I think I dropped all my frozen food on the floor and things fell out of my purse. We made eye contact, but I broke it partly because he was just too beautiful and it was blinding me and partly because I thought, “OH MY GOSH! HE KNOWS WHAT I’VE DONE! HE KNOWS I’VE BEEN LOOKING AT HIS INSTAGRAM!” He definitely recognized me, though we still had never officially met. It was like my life was in slow motion. As he walked past, I made eye contact again and gave a guilty smile. He had been looking at me the whole time he walked down the aisle which made me even more uneasy. When we made eye contact the second time, he just smiled and said, “Hi.” I said hi back. Haha glad that’s over. Instagram is a trap. You can creep years into the past, next thing you know, you will have liked a stranger’s picture accidentally.

Awkward Moment:Early Bird Gets the Worm

I was so excited to finally have an “official” job! The Manager said show up to orientation at 8 pm the following week. I prepared all day long and wore my nicest outfit. I mean I was dressed to IMPRESS. When I looked in the mirror I impressed my own self! I showed up at the workplace 15 minutes early, 7:45pm. I walked in, saw the manager and she gave me a glance. “Yes. Can I help you?” In my head I thought, “Well of course! Does she not remember me? I mean, does she not remember what time we scheduled orientation?” I responded with a smile, “Yes. I’m here for orientation.” She looked confused. “Orientation is tomorrow at 8 pm.” My eyes were wide. I couldn’t believe it! I showed up a WHOLE day early! “Oh! Yes! Of course it is! Wow. I could’ve swore it was today…(nervous laughter)…At least I’m early! (nervous smile)” She wasn’t smiling or laughing at the awkward situation which made things even more awkward. I just said, “Okay, see you tomorrow!” and briskly walked out. I could hear her loudly whispering to another employee, “Man, she is ready to work!” Wow. What a first impression, Ndi!